If I were Jeremy Corbyn, here’s what I’d be thinking one week on from election

RASHMEE ROSHAN LALL September 19, 2015

Jeremy Corbyn MP speaks at anti-drones rally, 27 April 2013.Hey ho, it’s one week since I, the 100-1 outsider, won the British Labour Party’s leadership election with more votes than Tony Blair in 1994.

  • It’s all been pretty confusing. The media says it’s confused. I don’t believe them. They want me to fail.
  • I may be Republican but I’m with Marcus Aurelius. So what if he was emperor for just about 20 years back in the 1st century AD;  old Marco got it right. “The object of life is not to be on the side of the majority, but to escape finding oneself in the ranks of the insane.” I’ll stick to what I believe in, ta very much, and that includes changing Britain to be more meritocratic country. Minus the royal family.
  • This Daily Telegraph story about my “alleged” liaison with Diane Abbott is the first time anyone has been interested in my love life in years. And years. And years. Or ever.
  • So I’ve got everyone’s knife in my back because I still believe what I’ve always done (socialism, down with the monarchy, down with nuclear weapons, make peace not war). What did they expect? That’s why I was elected.
  • Funny (not ha ha) how they went after Bernie Sanders in the US, just because he was warmly appreciative of my election win. I’m not saying he’s not a good guy but he’s not really socialist (not in the way I believe anyway). But may be that’s about the limit of what anyone can do in the US. Click here to watch Mr Sanders defending being “socialist’ to CNN. Can it get any worse?
  • Yes it can. Funny (ha ha, sort of) how all those Blair Labour Party-wallahs started to resign from shadow cabinet jobs I had not yet offered them.
  • Funny (not ha ha) how the media keeps saying I’m a terrorist-lover just because I believe in taking a 360-degree view of every issue.
  • Why would a snaggle-toothed 66-year-old believer in pacifism and redistributive justice be described by the Conservatives as a security threat? Surely kind hearts are more than national anthems and flags?

Oh well, I think I’ll just get back to my allotment. And when was the All Parliamentary Cheese Group meeting again?